怎样避免职场白痴地发脾气

 　　Scream at the boss? Snap at a colleague? Throw your cell phone into your computer monitor?

　　朝老板大喊大叫？对同事厉声斥责？把手机砸在电脑显示器上？

　　In most cases anger isn't an illness but a normal human emotion that causes problems when it flares¹ too hot, too often. People can learn to manage their anger with practical skills.

　　在大多数情况下，愤怒并不是一种疾病，而是一种正常的人类情绪，只不过在过度、过于频繁发生的时候才会导致问题。通过实际的技巧，人们可以学会管理自己的愤怒情绪。

　　Psychologists believe that individual talk therapy is the most effective for anger problems. Anger doesn't occur by itself. It's nested and embedded² with a lot of other emotions -- sadness, grief, shame. Angry people want to talk, given the opportunity.

　　心理学家认为，个人对话治疗是解决愤怒问题最有效的方法。愤怒并非单独产生的，它还隐含和嵌入着许多其它情绪，比如伤心、悲痛、羞辱等等。一旦有机会，愤怒的人总是想倾诉。

　　Tips to Help Keep A Temper in Check

　　有助于控制脾气的小贴士

　　Calculate what your anger is costing you. Many people with anger problems think anger gives them an edge, and establishes superiority. Instead, you just look like an idiot.

　　计算愤怒的成本。许多患有愤怒问题的人都会认为愤怒给予他们一定的优势，让他们具有优越感。其实恰恰相反，你看起来就像个白痴。

　　Be aware of how you talk to yourself. If you keep saying how awful this is and making yourself feel alike a victim, you will get more angry.

　　小心自言自语的方式。如果你总是在说这件事情是多么糟糕，让你自己感觉十足是个受害者的话，你就会变得更加愤怒。

　　If you feel a blowup coming on, give yourself a time-out before acting³ on it. Wait 15 minutes before you say something, or an hour before you send an email. Keep your options open. If it's not going to be important in an hour, then let it go. It's not worth getting angry about.

　　如果你感觉自己就要大发雷霆，那么不妨在爆发之前稍作停顿。过15分钟再开口，或者是过一个小时再发邮件。给自己多个选择。如果在一个小时之内这件事情变得不再那么重要的话，那么就让它过去吧。它不值得你为之生气。

　　Keep an "anger log" to monitor what makes you angry. Learn to identify and avoid your triggers.

　　记下"愤怒日志"，监控导致自己愤怒的因素。学习辨认和避免触发愤怒的扳机。

　　Don't ruminate⁵ on past affronts⁷ or injustices⁸.

　　莫要沉湎于过去所受的侮辱或者不公平。

　　Get physical, without fists. When your primitive⁹ brain senses a threat, it sets off the 'fight or flight' cascade¹⁰ of hormones¹¹. Opt⁴ for flight instead of fight and burn off the extra adrenaline and cortisol with exercise. Even a brisk walk will help calm you down.

　　以锻炼消耗精力，不用拳头。当你的原脑感觉到危险的时候，它会发出"打或逃"的激素链。选择逃而非打，通过锻炼消耗掉多余的肾上腺素和皮质醇。即便是一次轻快的散步也会有助于你平和情绪。

　　Reframe the situation. Instead of seeing every inconvenience or frustration¹² as a personal affront⁶, imagine a benign¹³ explanation.

　　重新组织自己面临的状况。与其把每一次困难或者沮丧的经历看作个人遭受的侮辱，倒不如设想一个善意的解释。

　　Find a constructive¹⁴ solution to the issue at hand. Ask yourself: What do I need to be okay right now? That shifts the focus from how the other person needs to be punished to how I need to respond in a healthy way.

　　找出一个建设性的解决办法应对手头的问题。问问你自己：我现在需要怎么做才能保持平静？这样就会将注意力转移，从专注于考虑对方必须受到怎样的惩罚，转移到要怎样才能以一种良好的方式应对。

1 flares   

n.喇叭裤v.（使）闪耀( flare的第三人称单数 )；（使）（船舷）外倾；（使）鼻孔张大；（使）（衣裙、酒杯等）呈喇叭形展开

参考例句：

• The side of a ship flares from the keel to the deck. 船舷从龙骨向甲板外倾。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• He's got a fiery temper and flares up at the slightest provocation. 他是火爆性子，一点就着。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》

2 embedded   

a.扎牢的

参考例句：

• an operation to remove glass that was embedded in his leg 取出扎入他腿部玻璃的手术
• He has embedded his name in the minds of millions of people. 他的名字铭刻在数百万人民心中。

3 acting   

n.演戏，行为，假装；adj.代理的，临时的，演出用的

参考例句：

• Ignore her,she's just acting.别理她，她只是假装的。
• During the seventies,her acting career was in eclipse.在七十年代，她的表演生涯黯然失色。

4 opt   

vi.选择，决定做某事

参考例句：

• They opt for more holiday instead of more pay.他们选择了延长假期而不是增加工资。
• Will individual schools be given the right to opt out of the local school authority?各个学校可能有权选择退出地方教育局吗？

5 ruminate   

v.反刍；沉思

参考例句：

• It is worth while to ruminate over his remarks.他的话值得玩味。
• The cow began to ruminate after eating up grass.牛吃完草后开始反刍。

6 affront   

n./v.侮辱，触怒

参考例句：

• Your behaviour is an affront to public decency.你的行为有伤风化。
• This remark caused affront to many people.这句话得罪了不少人。

7 affronts   

n.（当众）侮辱，（故意）冒犯( affront的名词复数 )v.勇敢地面对( affront的第三人称单数 )；相遇

参考例句：

• How can you stomach their affronts ? 你怎么能够忍受他们的侮辱？ 来自辞典例句
• It was true, acknowledgment in most cases of affronts was counted reparation sufficient. 的确，大部分的无理举动，只要认罪就时以算做足够的赔偿了。 来自辞典例句

8 injustices   

不公平( injustice的名词复数 )； 非正义； 待…不公正； 冤枉

参考例句：

• One who committed many injustices is doomed to failure. 多行不义必自毙。
• He felt confident that his injustices would be righted. 他相信他的冤屈会受到昭雪的。

9 primitive   

adj.原始的；简单的；n.原(始)人，原始事物

参考例句：

• It is a primitive instinct to flee a place of danger.逃离危险的地方是一种原始本能。
• His book describes the march of the civilization of a primitive society.他的著作描述了一个原始社会的开化过程。

10 cascade   

n.小瀑布，喷流；层叠；vi.成瀑布落下

参考例句：

• She watched the magnificent waterfall cascade down the mountainside.她看着壮观的瀑布从山坡上倾泻而下。
• Her hair fell over her shoulders in a cascade of curls.她的卷发像瀑布一样垂在肩上。

11 hormones   

n. 荷尔蒙，激素 名词hormone的复数形式

参考例句：

• This hormone interacts closely with other hormones in the body. 这种荷尔蒙与体內其他荷尔蒙紧密地相互作用。
• The adrenals produce a large per cent of a man's sex hormones. 肾上腺分泌人体的大部分性激素。

12 frustration   

n.挫折，失败，失效，落空

参考例句：

• He had to fight back tears of frustration.他不得不强忍住失意的泪水。
• He beat his hands on the steering wheel in frustration.他沮丧地用手打了几下方向盘。

13 benign   

adj.善良的，慈祥的；良性的，无危险的

参考例句：

• The benign weather brought North America a bumper crop.温和的气候给北美带来大丰收。
• Martha is a benign old lady.玛莎是个仁慈的老妇人。

14 constructive   

adj.建设的，建设性的

参考例句：

• We welcome constructive criticism.我们乐意接受有建设性的批评。
• He is beginning to deal with his anger in a constructive way.他开始用建设性的方法处理自己的怒气。