我就是火女神

 　　When I was eight years old, I saw a movie about a mysterious island that had an erupting volcano and lush jungles filled with wild animals and cannibals. The island was ruled by a beautiful woman called Tondalaya, the Fire Goddess of the Volcano. It was a terrible low budget movie, but to me, it represented the perfect life. Being chased by molten lava¹, blood thirsty animals and savages² was a small price to pay for freedom. I desperately³ wanted to be the Fire Goddess. I wrote it on my list of things to be when I grow up, and I asked my girlfriend if Fire Goddess was spelled with two "D"s.

　　八岁的时候，我看了一部电影：在神秘的岛屿上有一座喷发的火山和葱茏的丛林，丛林里有许多野生动物与食人族。统治岛屿的美丽女子是火山的火女神，名叫彤达拉雅。那是部糟糕的低成本电影，然而对我而言，它表现了完美的人生。受熔岩浆、嗜血动物和野人追逐是换取自由的一个小小代价。我极度渴望成为火女神。我将此列入长大之后要成为的清单中，并问女友火女神的写法是否有两个“D”。

　　Through the years, the school system did its best to mold me into a no nonsense, responsible, respectable citizen, and Tondalaya was forgotten. My parents approved of my suitable marriage and I spent the next 25 years being a good wife, eventually the mother of four, and a very respectable responsible member of society. My life was as bland⁴ and boring as a bowl of oatmeal. I knew exactly what to expect in the future. The children would grow up and leave home, my husband and I would grow old together, and we'd baby-sit the grandchildren.

　　多年过去，学校教育将我塑造成一个正统、负责、可敬的公民，我忘记了彤达拉雅。父母满意我那门当户对的婚姻，随后25年我成为一名好妻子，是四个孩子的母亲，是可敬而负责的社会一员。生活平静乏味得像碗燕麦粥。未来于我了然于胸：儿女长大、离家，与丈夫白首偕老，带养孙子孙女。

　　The week I turned 50, my marriage came to a sudden end. My house, furniture and everything I'd owned was auctioned⁵ off to pay debts I didn't even know existed. In a week I had lost my husband, my home and my parents who refused to accept a divorce in the family. I'd lost everything except my four teenage children. I had enough money to rent a cheap apartment while I looked for a job or I could use every penny I had to buy five plane tickets from Missouri to the most remote island in the world, the big island of Hawaii. Everyone said I was crazy to think I could just run off to an island and survive. They predicted I'd come crawling back in a month. Part of me was afraid they were right.

　　在我50岁的那个星期，婚姻突然结束了。房子、家具、我拥有的一切全给拍卖掉，用来偿还那些我从未知晓存在过的债款。一周之内我失去了丈夫、家园以及父母--他们对家里出现离婚心存抗拒。除了我四个年少的孩子，我失去了一切。我的钱够用来在找工作的同时租一所廉价公寓，或者我可以倾尽积蓄买五张机票从密苏里飞往天涯海角--夏威夷的大岛。人人都认为我打算逃到一个岛上还认为能够活下去的想法太荒唐了。他们预测不用过一个月，我准会爬着回来。我隐隐地害怕他们是对的。

　　The next day, my four children and I landed on the big island of Hawaii with less than $2,000, knowing no one in the world was going to help us. I rented an unfurnished apartment where we slept on the floor and lived on cereal. I worked three jobs scrubbing floors on my hands and knees, selling macadamia nuts to tourists and gathering⁶ coconuts⁷. I worked 18 hours a day and lost 30 pounds because I lived on one meal a day. I had panic attacks that left me curled into a knot on the bathroom floor shaking like a shell-shocked soldier.

　　次日，四个孩子与我登上夏威夷的大岛，带的钱不足两千美元，明白这世界上无人能够帮助我们。我租下一间没有家具的公寓，我们睡在地板上，以谷物为粮。我有三份工作：跪擦地板、向游客兜售澳洲坚果、采集椰子。我每天工作18个小时，由于一天只吃一顿，体重下降了30磅。焦虑侵袭着我，我蜷曲在浴室的地板上，抖得像个患了炮弹震荡症的士兵。

　　One night as I walked alone on the beach, I saw the red orange glow of the lava pouring out of Kilauea Volcano in the distance. I was wading⁸ in the Pacific Ocean, watching the world's most active volcano, and wasting that incredible moment, because I was haunted by the past, exhausted⁹ by the present and terrified of the future. I'd almost achieved my childhood dream but hadn't realized it, because I was focused on my burdens instead of my blessings¹⁰. It was time to live my imagination not my history. Tondalaya, the Fire Goddess of the Volcano had finally arrived.

　　一天夜晚，我走在沙滩上，看到远处乞劳伊阿火山喷出橙红色的岩浆。我正在太平洋岸趟水，观看着世界上最活跃的火山，然而我却白白地浪费了这精彩的一刻，因为过去让我挂怀，现在让我疲惫，而未来又让我惧怕。我只看到重担而没看到幸福，所以毫没意识到自己几乎已经实现了童年的梦想。那一瞬间，我忘记了往昔，想象再次苏醒了！彤达拉雅--火山的火女神--终于到来了。

　　The next day, I quit my jobs and invested my last paycheck in art supplies and began doing what I loved. I hadn't painted a picture in 15 years, because we barely scratched out a living on the farm in Missouri, and there hadn't been money for the tubes of paint, and canvas and frames. I wondered if I could still paint or if I had forgotten how. My hands trembled the first time I picked up a brush. But before an hour had passed, I was lost in the colors spreading across the canvas in front of me. I painted pictures of old sailing ships and as soon as I started believing in myself, other people started believing in me, too. The first painting sold for $1,500 before I even had time to frame it.

　　第二天，我辞去工作，把最后一笔薪水全花在艺术用品上，开始做起自己喜欢的事情来。15年以来我不曾画过一张画，因为在密苏里农场我们只是勉强糊口谋生，何况还没有钱买颜料、画布和画框。我怀疑自己是否还能画，怀疑是否还记得怎么画。第一次拿起画笔时，我的手都颤抖起来。还没到一个钟头，我就给涂在面前画布上的色彩弄得不知所措起来。我画的是古老的船只，等我渐渐拾起自信时，别人也开始对我有了信心。第一张画我还没来得及装框就卖出了1500美元。

　　The past six years have been filled with adventures. My children and I have gone swimming with dolphins, watched whales and hiked around the crater¹¹ rim¹² of the volcano. We wake up every morning with the ocean in front of us and the volcano behind us. The dream I had more than 40 years ago is now reality. I live on an island with a continuously erupting volcano. The only animals in the jungle are wild boars and mongooses and there aren't any cannibals. But often in the evening, I can hear the drums from native dancers on the beach.

　　过去的六年充满了冒险经历。孩子们与我和海豚一起游泳，观看鲸鱼，攀登火山口。每天早晨醒来，我们的前方是大海，后方是火山。我40多年前的梦想如今化为现实。我居住的岛上火山不断喷发，森林中只有野猪、猫鼬，没有食人族。而傍晚时分，我常常能听到土著在海滩上跳舞的鼓声。

　　I'm free for the first time in my life. I am Tondalaya, the Fire Goddess of the Volcano, spelled with two "D"s and I'm living happily ever after.

　　有生以来我第一次感到如此自由自在。我就是火山的火女神彤达拉雅，名字的写法是两个“D”，而且从此以后我一直幸福地生活着。

1 lava   

n.熔岩，火山岩

参考例句：

• The lava flowed down the sides of the volcano.熔岩沿火山坡面涌流而下。
• His anger spilled out like lava.他的愤怒像火山爆发似的迸发出来。

2 savages   

未开化的人，野蛮人( savage的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• There're some savages living in the forest. 森林里居住着一些野人。
• That's an island inhabited by savages. 那是一个野蛮人居住的岛屿。

3 desperately   

adv.极度渴望地，绝望地，孤注一掷地

参考例句：

• He was desperately seeking a way to see her again.他正拼命想办法再见她一面。
• He longed desperately to be back at home.他非常渴望回家。

4 bland   

adj.淡而无味的，温和的，无刺激性的

参考例句：

• He eats bland food because of his stomach trouble.他因胃病而吃清淡的食物。
• This soup is too bland for me.这汤我喝起来偏淡。

5 auctioned   

v.拍卖( auction的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• It was sad to see all grandmother's lovely things being auctioned off. 眼看着祖母那些可爱的东西全都被拍卖掉，心里真不好受。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• TV franchises will be auctioned to the highest bidder. 电视特许经营权将拍卖给出价最高的投标人。 来自《简明英汉词典》

6 gathering   

n.集会，聚会，聚集

参考例句：

• He called on Mr. White to speak at the gathering.他请怀特先生在集会上讲话。
• He is on the wing gathering material for his novels.他正忙于为他的小说收集资料。

7 coconuts   

n.椰子( coconut的名词复数 )；椰肉，椰果

参考例句：

• We found a bountiful supply of coconuts on the island. 我们发现岛上有充足的椰子供应。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• Coconuts provide "meat", drink, oil, soap and fiber for fishing line. 椰子提供“肉类”，饮料、油脂、肥皂和做钓（鱼）丝的纤维。 来自百科语句

8 wading   

（从水、泥等）蹚，走过，跋( wade的现在分词 )

参考例句：

• The man tucked up his trousers for wading. 那人卷起裤子，准备涉水。
• The children were wading in the sea. 孩子们在海水中走着。

9 exhausted   

adj.极其疲惫的，精疲力尽的

参考例句：

• It was a long haul home and we arrived exhausted.搬运回家的这段路程特别长，到家时我们已筋疲力尽。
• Jenny was exhausted by the hustle of city life.珍妮被城市生活的忙乱弄得筋疲力尽。

10 blessings   

n.（上帝的）祝福( blessing的名词复数 )；好事；福分；因祸得福

参考例句：

• Afflictions are sometimes blessings in disguise. 塞翁失马，焉知非福。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• We don't rely on blessings from Heaven. 我们不靠老天保佑。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》

11 crater   

n.火山口，弹坑

参考例句：

• With a telescope you can see the huge crater of Ve-suvius.用望远镜你能看到巨大的维苏威火山口。
• They came to the lip of a dead crater.他们来到了一个死火山口。

12 rim   

n.(圆物的)边，轮缘；边界

参考例句：

• The water was even with the rim of the basin.盆里的水与盆边平齐了。
• She looked at him over the rim of her glass.她的目光越过玻璃杯的边沿看着他。