Don't 'Bite the Hand That Feeds You'

And now, Words and Their Stories from VOA Learning¹ English.

Relationships between people can be complex. So, to help there are some good rules to follow. For example, when dealing² with people at work or with a friend, it is usually a good idea to stay calm and be easygoing.

Personal or working relationships can be damaged if you shout at other people or get angry with someone. This is especially true if that certain "someone" helps you in a meaningful way – like making sure you get paid!

To describe that situation, the English language has a very useful expression: to bite the hand that feeds you.

This phrase means that you act badly toward³ the person who is helping⁴ or has helped you. When you bite the hand that feeds you, you are being unthankful, ungrateful, unappreciative. And that is a lot of "un" words. In other words, you turn against, attack, and even harm someone who is helping you.

We often use this expression as a word of advice -- as in don't bite or you should not bite the hand that feeds you.

Now let's use it in an example.

Let's say someone comes to your place of business and wants to buy something from you or even offer you a chance at a new job. But you, in return, are rude to that person. In that case, I could say to you: "You should not bite the hand that feeds you."

This expression can also mean to turn against someone who helped you in the past. Used this way, you do not show respect for someone who has been there for you.

Some people say this phrase goes all the way back to ancient Greece. The poet Sappho was said to have used it over 2,600 years ago.

Other experts claim that one of Aesop's Fables⁵, called "The Gardener and His Dog," shows an example of this expression.

The story goes something like this: A gardener's dog was playing in a garden near a well and then fell in. The owner ran to help. He reached his hand into the well to pull out his dog. But as the man did this – the dog bit him on the hand!

"What very ungrateful behavior! I only came to help!" said the gardener. So, he left the dog and walked away.

The dog bit that hand that fed him. And that was a big mistake.

Here is another example.

Let's say I am working as an interior⁶ designer. I go into people's homes and decide how to improve them. I choose everything from wall paint and floorings to artwork, tables, and chairs.

Now, because I own my own business, my clients⁸ are very important to me. They are my ‘bread and butter,' meaning my earnings⁹ are based on the money they pay me. If my clients are happy with my work, they will tell other people. And that word-of-mouth business means more work and more money for me.

But there is a problem: I have a difficult client⁷. He is always changing his mind about design decisions and does not communicate well. So, small issues often become big problems.

What should I do? On one hand, I could tell him to find another interior designer. On the other hand, I could just find a way to work with him. If the economy is weak, it may not be a good idea to lose a client, even a difficult one. I decide to not bite the hand that feeds me and put up with the difficult client. If the economy improves, then I can show him the door!

And that's our show for today. Try using this expression. Have you ever bitten the hand that fed you or perhaps someone bit your hand?

Words in This Story

ungrateful – adj. not feeling or showing thanks for favors, help, gifts, etc.

unappreciative – adj. not giving recognition¹⁰ or thanks for something

rude – adj. not having or showing concern or respect for the rights and feelings of other people : not polite

gardener – n. one who spends time cultivating¹¹ plants and tending a garden for pleasure or recreation

client – n. a person who uses the professional advice or services of another

word-of-mouth – adj. oral communication

show someone the door – slang expression to rid of someone quickly and without concern

1 learning   

n.学问，学识，学习；动词learn的现在分词

参考例句：

• When you are learning to ride a bicycle,you often fall off.初学骑自行车时，常会从车上掉下来。
• Learning languages isn't just a matter of remembering words.学习语言不仅仅是记些单词的事。

2 dealing   

n.经商方法，待人态度

参考例句：

• This store has an excellent reputation for fair dealing.该商店因买卖公道而享有极高的声誉。
• His fair dealing earned our confidence.他的诚实的行为获得我们的信任。

3 toward   

prep.对于，关于，接近，将近，向，朝

参考例句：

• Suddenly I saw a tall figure approaching toward the policeman.突然间我看到一个高大的身影朝警察靠近。
• Upon seeing her,I smiled and ran toward her. 看到她我笑了，并跑了过去。

4 helping   

n.食物的一份&adj.帮助人的，辅助的

参考例句：

• The poor children regularly pony up for a second helping of my hamburger. 那些可怜的孩子们总是要求我把我的汉堡包再给他们一份。
• By doing this, they may at times be helping to restore competition. 这样一来, 他在某些时候,有助于竞争的加强。

5 fables   

n.寓言( fable的名词复数 )；神话，传说

参考例句：

• Some of Aesop's Fables are satires. 《伊索寓言》中有一些是讽刺作品。 来自《现代英汉综合大词典》
• Little Mexican boys also breathe the American fables. 墨西哥族的小孩子对美国神话也都耳濡目染。 来自辞典例句

6 interior   

adj.在内的，内部的，内地的，国内的；n.内部

参考例句：

• There is water in the interior of the cave.在山洞的内部有水。
• They went into the interior room.他们进了内室。

7 client   

n.委托人，当事人，顾客

参考例句：

• She can't come to the telephone;she's serving a client.她不能来接电话，她正在接待一位顾客。
• The lawyer produced a clever defence of his client.律师机智地为委托人辩护。

8 clients   

n.顾客( client的名词复数 )；当事人；诉讼委托人；[计算机]客户端

参考例句：

• a lawyer with many famous clients 拥有许多著名委托人的律师
• She understood the importance of establishing a close rapport with clients. 她懂得与客户建立密切和谐的关系的重要性。

9 earnings   

n.工资收人；利润，利益，所得

参考例句：

• That old man lives on the earnings of his daughter.那个老人靠他女儿的收入维持生活。
• Last year there was a 20% decrease in his earnings.去年他的收入减少了20%。

10 recognition   

n.承认，认可，认出，认识

参考例句：

• The place has changed beyond recognition.这地方变得认不出来了。
• A sudden smile of recognition flashed across his face.他脸上掠过一丝笑意，表示认识对方。

11 cultivating   

v.耕( cultivate的现在分词 )；建立（友谊）；种植；陶冶思想[感情]

参考例句：

• The farmer is cultivating his land. 农民在耕耘土地。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• The responsibilities of a teacher lie not only in the inculcation of knowledge, but also in the setting of good examples and cultivating of virtues. 老师的责任不单是传授知识，更要树立良好榜样，培养学生的品德。 来自《简明英汉词典》