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见信如晤Letters Live 第2期:'抖森'读信:未与你共度一切(上)

时间:2017-06-07 00:42来源:互联网 提供网友:mapleleaf   字体: [ ]
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    (单词翻译:双击或拖选)

 July 31st, 1978

 
1978年7月31日
My darling McGeorge,
亲爱的麦克乔治:
You said that things seemed clearer when they were written down.
你曾说过把事情写下来,他们就会变得更清楚。
Well, here with a very boring letter in which I will try and put everything down so that you may read and re-read at horror at your folly1 in getting involved with me.
那么这恐怕是一封很无聊的信,在信里我会试着把所有的东西都写下来,因此你会在恐惧中反复阅读,为爱上我而感到愚蠢。
Deep breath.
深呼吸。
To begin with I love you with a depth and passion that I have felt for no one else in this life and if it astonishes you it astonishes me as well.
 
首先,我如此深切热烈的爱你,以至于我此生不会再爱上其他人,如果这让你吃惊,它同样让我觉得不可思议。
Not, I hasten to say, because you are not worth loving.
我必须要说,并不是你不值得去爱。
Far from it.
远不是如此。
It's just that, first of all, I swore I would not get involved with another woman.
只是,首先我发誓我不会再爱上另外一个女人。
Secondly2, I have never had such a feeling before and it is almost frightening.
其次,我从未有过这样的感觉,因而感到害怕。
Thirdly, I would never have thought it possible that another human being could occupy my waking (and sleeping) thoughts to the exclusion3 of almost everything else.
第三,我从未想过会有一个人会占据我所有的时间(包括睡觉的时候)让我无时无刻不在想她。
Fourthly, I never thought that – even if one was in love – one could get so completely besotted with another person, so that a minute away from them felt like a thousand years.
第四,我从未想过会有人,即使是处于恋爱中的人,会如此迷恋对方,以至于分开哪怕一分钟都像相隔千年。
Fifthly, I never hoped, aspired4, dreamed that one could find everything one wanted in one person.
第五,我从未希望、渴求、幻想过能在另外一个人身上得到我想要的一切。
I was not such an idiot as to believe this was possible.
我还没有愚蠢到认为这是可能的。
Yet in you I have found everything I want: you are beautiful, gay, giving, gentle, idiotically and deliciously feminine, sexy, wonderfully intelligent and wonderfully silly as well.
但是在你身上我找到了我想要的一切:你不但温柔美丽,还性格随和乐于助人,你性感撩人、聪明机灵中还带着点傻里傻气的天真。
I want nothing else in this life than to be with you, to listen and watch you (your beautiful voice, your beauty), to argue with you, to laugh with you, to show you things and share things with you, to explore your magnificent mind, to explore your wonderful body, to help you, protect you, serve you, and bash you on the head when I think you are wrong …
我这辈子只想和你在一起,聆听你的动人声音,欣赏你的美丽容颜,与你同甘共苦,分享生活点滴,探索你的浩渺思绪和曼妙身姿,帮助你,保护你,服务你,在我认为你犯错了的时候念叨你……
Not to put too fine a point on it I consider that I am the only man outside mythology5 to have found the crock of gold at the rainbow's end.
坦白来说,我认为我是唯一一个在神话中的彩虹尽头发现了金匣子的人。
But – having said all that – let us consider things in detail.
但是说完这些,让我们从细节角度考虑。
Don't let this become public but … well, I have one or two faults.
不要公开这件事……但是确实,我会犯一回两回错。
Minor6 ones, I hasten to say.
甚至更多小错误,我必须承认。
For example, I am inclined to be overbearing.
比如说,我有时候会有些蛮横。
I do it for the best possible motives7 (all tyrants8 say that) but I do tend (without thinking) to tread people underfoot.
我这么做的目的是好的(所有的暴君都这么说),但是我确实容易(不加思考)忽略别人的想法。
You must tell me when I am doing it to you, my sweet, because it can be a very bad thing in a marriage.
亲爱的,当我对你这么做的时候你一定要告诉我,因为这会是一段婚姻中非常糟糕的事情。
Right. Second blemish9.
那么,第二个缺点。
This, actually, is not so much a blemish of character as a blemish of circumstance.
这其实是一个形势的瑕疵而不是一个人性格上的瑕疵。
Darling I want you to be you in your own right and I will do everything I can to help you in this.
亲爱的我希望你有做自己的权利,为此我会尽我所能来帮助你。
But you must take into consideration that I am also me in my own right and that I have a headstart on you …
但同样的你也要考虑到我也有做自己的权利,而且我比你有优势……
What I am trying to say is that you must not feel offended if you are sometimes treated simply as my wife.
我想说的是,如果有的时候我怠慢了你,你千万不要气恼。
Always remember that what you lose on the swings you gain on the roundabouts.
要时刻记住失之东隅,收之桑榆。
But I am an established 'creature' in the world, and so – on occasions – you will have to live in my shadow.
然而我在世界上算是一个“知名”人物,有时你可能会活在我的光环之下。
Nothing gives me less pleasure than this but it is a fact of life that has to be faced.
这是让我最不开心的一件事,但是我们却都要面对。
Third (and very important and nasty) blemish: jealousy10.
第三个缺点(非常重要和严重):嫉妒。
I don't think you know what jealousy is (thank God) in the real sense of the word.
我认为你并不知道嫉妒的真正含义(感谢上帝)。
I know that you have felt jealousy over Lincoln’s wife and child, but this is what I call normal jealousy, and this – to my regret – is not what I've got.
我知道你肯定羡慕过林肯的妻子和孩子,这种是我所说的一般嫉妒,但这很遗憾也是我没能得到的。
What I have got is a black monster that can pervert11 my good sense, my good humour and any goodness that I have in my make-up.
我得到的是一个能够扭曲我的想法、幽默和善良的邪恶怪物。
It is really a Jekyll and Hyde situation … my Hyde is stronger than my good sense and defeats me, hard though I try.
这是一个双重人格的情况……我的邪恶面要比我的善良面更强,并且打败了我,尽管我尽力反抗也于事无补。
As I told you, I have always known that this lurks12 within me, but I could control it, and my monster slumbered13 and nothing happened to awake it.
正如我告诉你的一样,我一直知道这些潜伏在我心中,我能控制它,我内心的怪物正蛰伏,却没有任何事物能够唤醒它。
Then I met you and I felt my monster stir and become half awake when you told me of Lincoln and others you have known, and with your letter my monster came out of its lair14, black, irrational15, bigoted16, stupid, evil, malevolent17.
之后我遇见了你,我心中的怪物苏醒了,并且在你告诉我林肯以及其他你认识的人的时候就已经半醒了,随着你的信,我心中那黑暗的、不理性的、偏执的、愚蠢的、邪恶的怪物走出了它的兽穴。
You will never know how terribly corrosive18 jealousy is; it is a physical pain as though you had swallowed acid or red hot coals.
你不会知道恶毒的嫉妒会有多么糟糕,那像是喝下迷幻药或者是烧红煤块带来的痛。
It is the most terrible of feelings.
这是最糟糕的感觉。

点击收听单词发音收听单词发音  

1 folly QgOzL     
n.愚笨,愚蠢,蠢事,蠢行,傻话
参考例句:
  • Learn wisdom by the folly of others.从别人的愚蠢行动中学到智慧。
  • Events proved the folly of such calculations.事情的进展证明了这种估计是愚蠢的。
2 secondly cjazXx     
adv.第二,其次
参考例句:
  • Secondly,use your own head and present your point of view.第二,动脑筋提出自己的见解。
  • Secondly it is necessary to define the applied load.其次,需要确定所作用的载荷。
3 exclusion 1hCzz     
n.拒绝,排除,排斥,远足,远途旅行
参考例句:
  • Don't revise a few topics to the exclusion of all others.不要修改少数论题以致排除所有其他的。
  • He plays golf to the exclusion of all other sports.他专打高尔夫球,其他运动一概不参加。
4 aspired 379d690dd1367e3bafe9aa80ae270d77     
v.渴望,追求( aspire的过去式和过去分词 )
参考例句:
  • She aspired to a scientific career. 她有志于科学事业。
  • Britain,France,the United States and Japan all aspired to hegemony after the end of World War I. 第一次世界大战后,英、法、美、日都想争夺霸权。 来自《简明英汉词典》
5 mythology I6zzV     
n.神话,神话学,神话集
参考例句:
  • In Greek mythology,Zeus was the ruler of Gods and men.在希腊神话中,宙斯是众神和人类的统治者。
  • He is the hero of Greek mythology.他是希腊民间传说中的英雄。
6 minor e7fzR     
adj.较小(少)的,较次要的;n.辅修学科;vi.辅修
参考例句:
  • The young actor was given a minor part in the new play.年轻的男演员在这出新戏里被分派担任一个小角色。
  • I gave him a minor share of my wealth.我把小部分财产给了他。
7 motives 6c25d038886898b20441190abe240957     
n.动机,目的( motive的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • to impeach sb's motives 怀疑某人的动机
  • His motives are unclear. 他的用意不明。
8 tyrants b6c058541e716c67268f3d018da01b5e     
专制统治者( tyrant的名词复数 ); 暴君似的人; (古希腊的)僭主; 严酷的事物
参考例句:
  • The country was ruled by a succession of tyrants. 这个国家接连遭受暴君的统治。
  • The people suffered under foreign tyrants. 人民在异族暴君的统治下受苦受难。
9 blemish Qtuz5     
v.损害;玷污;瑕疵,缺点
参考例句:
  • The slightest blemish can reduce market value.只要有一点最小的损害都会降低市场价值。
  • He wasn't about to blemish that pristine record.他本不想去玷污那清白的过去。
10 jealousy WaRz6     
n.妒忌,嫉妒,猜忌
参考例句:
  • Some women have a disposition to jealousy.有些女人生性爱妒忌。
  • I can't support your jealousy any longer.我再也无法忍受你的嫉妒了。
11 pervert o3uzK     
n.堕落者,反常者;vt.误用,滥用;使人堕落,使入邪路
参考例句:
  • Reading such silly stories will pervert your taste for good books.读这种愚昧的故事会败坏你对好书的嗜好。
  • Do not pervert the idea.别歪曲那想法。
12 lurks 469cde53259c49b0ab6b04dd03bf0b7a     
n.潜在,潜伏;(lurk的复数形式)vi.潜伏,埋伏(lurk的第三人称单数形式)
参考例句:
  • Behind his cool exterior lurks a reckless and frustrated person. 在冷酷的外表背后,他是一个鲁莽又不得志的人。 来自《简明英汉词典》
  • Good fortune lies within Bad, Bad fortune lurks within good. 福兮祸所倚,祸兮福所伏。 来自互联网
13 slumbered 90bc7b1e5a8ccd9fdc68d12edbd1f200     
微睡,睡眠(slumber的过去式与过去分词形式)
参考例句:
  • The baby slumbered in his cradle. 婴儿安睡在摇篮中。
  • At that time my virtue slumbered; my evil, kept awake by ambition. 就在那时,我的善的一面睡着了,我的邪恶面因野心勃勃而清醒着。
14 lair R2jx2     
n.野兽的巢穴;躲藏处
参考例句:
  • How can you catch tiger cubs without entering the tiger's lair?不入虎穴,焉得虎子?
  • I retired to my lair,and wrote some letters.我回到自己的躲藏处,写了几封信。
15 irrational UaDzl     
adj.无理性的,失去理性的
参考例句:
  • After taking the drug she became completely irrational.她在吸毒后变得完全失去了理性。
  • There are also signs of irrational exuberance among some investors.在某些投资者中是存在非理性繁荣的征象的。
16 bigoted EQByV     
adj.固执己见的,心胸狭窄的
参考例句:
  • He is so bigoted that it is impossible to argue with him.他固执得不可理喻。
  • I'll concede you are not as bigoted as some.我承认你不象有些人那么顽固。
17 malevolent G8IzV     
adj.有恶意的,恶毒的
参考例句:
  • Why are they so malevolent to me?他们为什么对我如此恶毒?
  • We must thwart his malevolent schemes.我们决不能让他的恶毒阴谋得逞。
18 corrosive wzsxn     
adj.腐蚀性的;有害的;恶毒的
参考例句:
  • Many highly corrosive substances are used in the nuclear industry.核工业使用许多腐蚀性很强的物质。
  • Many highly corrosive substances are used in the nuclear industry.核工业使用许多腐蚀性很强的物质。
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