《柯南脱口秀》第98期:西南航空上新闻

 Southwest airlines in the news.Southwest airlines has widened its seats by almost one inch. 西南航空上新闻了 西南航空将座位加宽了近1英寸

I don't think that's going to help because during the announcement,Americans widened their asses² by over 10 inches. 但我觉得这没什么用 因为在消息宣布期间 美国人的屁股加宽了近10英寸

This all happens in one second.It just pops out.That's the sound it makes when your ass¹ explodes.Katai!That's right,write it down. 1秒钟的事 一下就大了 那就是你屁股爆炸的声音 卡擦 没错 相信我

A Wisconsin woman recently got a high school diploma at the age of 103 and says she is now considering going to college. 一名威斯康辛州女子最近拿到了高中毕业证 她已经103岁高龄了 并称在考虑上大学

Friends are recommending a two-year college. 朋友们建议她上两年制的学校

A new report just came out.I can't make this stuff up. 一项新报告刚刚出炉 这都不是编的

A new report shows that the typical tourist in Las Vegas,according to statistics³, 一项新报告显示 拉斯维加斯的普通游客 这是统计学数据

a typical tourist in Las Vegas is a 45-year-old married person from California. 拉斯维加斯的普通游客是45岁的加州已婚人士

That explains the new motto what happens in Vegas probably also happens in Fresno. 怪不得他们的新座右铭 是维加斯发生的事 大概也会在佛雷斯诺上演

There's a woman over here,but also the 45 year old married guy.A women just went,that sounds right. 那边有个女人 45岁已婚人士 那女人说 是啊 差不多

I can hear you.That sounds right.That sounds right.You can continue now,conan.You have my permission. 我听得到哦 是啊 差不多 差不多 继续吧 柯南 恩准你了

 

1 ass   

n.驴；傻瓜，蠢笨的人

参考例句：

• He is not an ass as they make him.他不象大家猜想的那样笨。
• An ass endures his burden but not more than his burden.驴能负重但不能超过它能力所负担的。

2 asses   

n. 驴，愚蠢的人，臀部 adv. (常用作后置)用于贬损或骂人

参考例句：

• Sometimes I got to kick asses to make this place run right. 有时我为了把这个地方搞得像个样子，也不得不踢踢别人的屁股。 来自教父部分
• Those were wild asses maybe, or zebras flying around in herds. 那些也许是野驴或斑马在成群地奔跑。

3 statistics   

n.统计，统计数字，统计学

参考例句：

• We have statistics for the last year.我们有去年的统计资料。
• Statistics is taught in many colleges.许多大学都教授统计学。