【双语有声阅读】男女之间 Between Men and Women

Between Men and Women

 

男女之间

Men's Declaration¹

男人的宣言

1. Most guys own three pairs of shoes—enough.

大多数男人有三双鞋——足够了。

2. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy² is what your girlfriends are for.

有困难时，除非你们需要人帮忙解决，否则别找我们。我们帮你解决问题。如果为了博取同情，请去找你们的女性朋友。

3. If you think you are fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We've been tricked before!

如果你觉得你很胖，你很可能是真的胖。别来问我们。我们都上过当。

4. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know how to do it, just do it yourself.

你们要么请我们做事，要么告诉我们你们想要我们怎么做。不要同时要求。如果你们已经知道怎么做，那自己做好了。

5. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.

哥伦布不需要别人给他指点航行方向，我们也不需要。

6. If it itches³, it will be scratched⁴. We do that.

如果那里出现问题，我们会对症下药解决问题。

7. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing", we will act like nothing is wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the trouble.

如果我们问你们怎么了，而你们说“没事”，那我们只能装作没事一样。我们不是不知道你们在说谎，只是觉得不值得为此小题大做而已。

8. Beer is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.

啤酒之于我们就像手提包之于你们，会令人兴奋异常。

9. Women, learn to work the toilet seat. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

女人，学会使用马桶。如果坐便器抬起了，把它放下。我们需要抬起，你们需要放下。你们无视我们的抱怨，不把它抬起就离开了厕所。

10. Thank you for reading⁵ this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch⁶ tonight, but did you know? It's fun like camping⁷.

谢谢看完上述条目。是的，我们知道今晚我们得睡沙发，但是你们知道么，睡沙发犹如露营，我们一点不在乎。

Differences

差异

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item⁸ he needs.

男人愿意付2美元买价值1美元但是他需要的东西。

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.

女人愿意花1元钱买价值2元但是她不想要的东西。

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

女人找了老公之前都在担忧未来。

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

男人娶了老婆之前从来不为未来担忧。

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

要想与一个男人开心相处，你必须更多地体谅他，尽量不纠缠他。

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot but not try to understand her at all.

要想与一个女人开心相处，你必须更多地爱她，但不用完全理解她。

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

女人希望他嫁的男人会改变，可是他不会改变。

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.

男人希望女人在婚后不要改变，但她却变了。

A man falls in love with his eyes.

一个男人会因为视觉愉悦爱上对方。

A woman falls in love with her ears.

一个女人会因听觉愉悦爱上对方。

1 declaration   

n.宣布，宣告，宣言，声明（书），申报

参考例句：

• We read the declaration posted on the bulletin board.我们读了贴在布告板上的声明。
• At the recent convention a declaration was adopted.在最近举行的大会上通过了一项宣言。

2 sympathy   

n.同情，赞同，同感，慰问，吊唁

参考例句：

• He felt great sympathy for these people.他很同情这些人。
• Sympathy is his best quality.同情心是他最好的品质。

3 itches   

n.痒( itch的名词复数 )；渴望，热望v.发痒( itch的第三人称单数 )

参考例句：

• His wool shirt always itches him. 他的羊毛内衣总是使他发痒。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》
• This wool shirt itches my back. 这件羊毛衫使我背上发痒。 来自《现代英汉综合大词典》

4 scratched   

[体]弃权

参考例句：

• John yawned and scratched his chin. 约翰打个哈欠，挠挠下巴。
• The investigation barely scratched the surface of the city's drug problem. 这次调查只是触及了该城市毒品问题的表面。 来自《简明英汉词典》

5 reading   

n.阅读，知识，读物，表演，对法律条文的解释；adj.阅读的

参考例句：

• Children learn reading and writing at school.孩子们在学校学习阅读和写作。
• He finds pleasure in reading.他从阅读中得到乐趣。

6 couch   

n.睡椅，长沙发椅；vt.表达，隐含

参考例句：

• Lie down on the couch if you're feeling ill.如果你感觉不舒服就躺到沙发上去。
• The rabbIt'sprang from its grassy couch.兔子从草丛中跳出。

7 camping   

n.野营，露营，帐幕生活

参考例句：

• When are you going camping again?你什么时候再去露营？
• My class went camping last summer.去年夏天我们班去露营了。

8 item   

n.项目；条款；（消息，情报等的）一条

参考例句：

• We should go on to the next item for time is short.时间不多了，我们应该谈下一项内容。
• Put this item on our daily work schedule.把这项工作提到议事日程上来。