【双语有声阅读】理解嫉妒 Understanding Jealousy(下)

Women are concerned about their partner becoming attracted to other women by sex, intelligence, and other attractions, and dissatisfaction with the current relationship.

女人担心她们的伴侣被其他女人的性感、理解力和其他特质所吸引，担心会对现在的关系不满意。

Men are more concerned about protecting their egos² if they are "beaten out" by another man; they worry about their partner having sex with someone else (but they'd probably blame the partner if that did happen).

如果男人因为竞争而筋疲力尽，他们更在意自我保护；他们担心伴侣与他人发生性关系（但是如果发生了，他们很可能会责备对方）。

It is in this deep worry and spying stage that we go crazy.

这种极度忧虑和暗中监视会让我们发疯。

Emotional reactions: If we decide there is a threat to our love, we can have a very wide range of responses: clinging dependency, anger at the competitor or the partner, morbid³ curiosity, self-criticism, and depression with suicidal thoughts, hurt and resentment⁴ of the partner's lack of devotion, social embarrassment⁵, selfish—sometimes realistic—concerns ("I'd better take the money out of the bank"), urge to "get back at" the partner, fear of losing companionship, loneliness, regrets at giving up all the future plans, etc.

情绪反应：如果我们确信爱情有威胁，我们会有一系列的反应：执着的依赖，憎恨竞争者或者伴侣，恐怖的好奇心，自我批评，有轻生的沮丧念头，厌恶对方没有投入感情，社交障碍，自私——有时候现实——忧虑（我最好把钱取出银行），报复对方的强烈愿望，害怕失去伴侣，孤独，后悔放弃未来的所有的计划，等等。

Coping response: There are two basic choices—trying to save the threatened relationship or trying to protect your sagging⁶ ego¹.

应对响应：有两个基本的选择——要么维护好受到威胁的关系，要么保护好自己的心。

Men are more likely to become competitive or angry, often including getting drunk.

男人更可能会更有竞争意识或者生气，常会一醉方休。

Women more often become weak and depressed⁷.

女人通常会变得脆弱和失望。

After an affair, men want sexual details and women want to know how serious the relationship is.

在遭遇背叛之后，男人想知道和性有关的细节，女人想知道关系发展到什么地步了。

1 ego   

n.自我，自己，自尊

参考例句：

• He is absolute ego in all thing.在所有的事情上他都绝对自我。
• She has been on an ego trip since she sang on television.她上电视台唱过歌之后就一直自吹自擂。

2 egos   

自我，自尊，自负( ego的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• Their egos are so easily bruised. 他们的自尊心很容易受到伤害。
• The belief in it issues from the puerile egos of inferior men. 这种信仰是下等人幼稚的自私意识中产生的。

3 morbid   

adj.病的；致病的；病态的；可怕的

参考例句：

• Some people have a morbid fascination with crime.一些人对犯罪有一种病态的痴迷。
• It's morbid to dwell on cemeteries and such like.不厌其烦地谈论墓地以及诸如此类的事是一种病态。

4 resentment   

n.怨愤，忿恨

参考例句：

• All her feelings of resentment just came pouring out.她一股脑儿倾吐出所有的怨恨。
• She cherished a deep resentment under the rose towards her employer.她暗中对她的雇主怀恨在心。

5 embarrassment   

n.尴尬；使人为难的人(事物)；障碍；窘迫

参考例句：

• She could have died away with embarrassment.她窘迫得要死。
• Coughing at a concert can be a real embarrassment.在音乐会上咳嗽真会使人难堪。

6 sagging   

下垂[沉，陷]，松垂，垂度

参考例句：

• The morale of the enemy troops is continuously sagging. 敌军的士气不断低落。
• We are sagging south. 我们的船正离开航线向南漂流。

7 depressed   

adj.沮丧的，抑郁的，不景气的，萧条的

参考例句：

• When he was depressed,he felt utterly divorced from reality.他心情沮丧时就感到完全脱离了现实。
• His mother was depressed by the sad news.这个坏消息使他的母亲意志消沉。