You and Your Boss

When you take a long time, you're slow.
When your boss takes a long time, he's thorough¹.
 
When you don't do it, you're lazy.
When your boss doesn't do it, he's too busy.
 
When you make a mistake, you're an idiot(蠢货).
When your boss makes a mistake, he's only human.
 
When doing something without being told, you're overstepping your authority（超越权限）.
When your boss does the same thing, that's initiative(创造性).
 
When you take a stand（表态）, you're being bull-headed（固执）.
When your boss does it, he's being firm.
 
When you overlooked(忽略) a rule of etiquette(礼貌), you're being rude.
When your boss skips(略过) a few rules, he's being original(独创的).
 
When you please your boss, you're arse-creeping(拍马屁).
When your boss please his boss, he's being co-operative(合作).
 
When you're out of the office, you're wandering around.
When your boss is out of the office, he's on business.
 
When you have one too many drinks at a social, you're a drunken bum(耍酒疯者).
When your boss does the same, he appreciated(欣赏) women.
 
When you're on a day off sick, you're always sick.
When your boss is a day off sick, he must be very ill.
 
When you apply for leave, you must be going for an interview.
When your boss applies for leave, it 's because he's overworked.

1 thorough   

adj. 彻底的，完全的，精心的

参考例句：

• He made a very thorough analysis on the situation.他对形势的分析很透彻。
• The committee reported its findings after a thorough investigation.委员会在彻底调查以后报告了调查结果。