Jason: Oh sa-weet heart. You know, i was just thinking, with Carol working late and Chrissy asleep, Bens out doing god knows what, you and I have this whole house to ourselves. Maggie: Jason, its not even dark out. Jason: I know. Maggie: Honey, cant...
Mike: cartoons! Ben, you are watching cartoons at your age? Ben: Whats wrong with that? Mike: Whats wrong Ben, is that with cable, we have got the all womens wrestling channel. Oh hey, the road runner! My favorite. Maggie: Maybe you didnt take your...
Professor Thorn: So, we have reached that magical time, the last drama project of the year. Now, upon graduation from Landen, many of you will go on to pursue your theatre dreams in Broadway, television, the cinema; or if you're really serious by be...
Stinky: Is it A, Gastropods, B, Marsupials or C, Planaria? Ben: Um...don't help me, here. Stinky: I can't. Ben: Um... It's A, that thing with gas. Stinky: No, it's D, none of the above. Ben: But you didn't even say that! Stinky: I didn't think it wa...
TV He drives for the basket, two seconds, he's up, it's good! Mike Jason and Ben: (cheering) TV And the Knicks tie it up! We go into overtime! Jason: Alright here we go! Maggie: Jason! Chrissy and I are getting tired of waiting out in the car. You s...
Maggie: OK Ben, we'll be back from the theatre by eleven, unless your father springs an after show supper...we'll be back by eleven. Now, you know Chrissy's diapers are and I laid out her pajamas, and I don't think it's a very good idea for you to h...
Mike: Due to the continuing flu epidemic, the following teachers will be out today, and their classes cancelled. Oh, Kate you read 'em, I'm too nervous. Kate: Professor Forrest, Chem. and Bio labs. Mike: Oh, I knew I should have taken Chemistry. Kat...
Ben: I can't believe it! I just can't believe it; Laura-Lynn standing me up, me! And on Valentine's Day. Carol: Ben, why do you keep going with Laura-Lynn if she makes you so miserable? I mean, I don't mean to sound judgmental but it makes you look...
Ben: Great Stinky, I'll meet you at the mall in twenty minutes. I'll be in women's underwear. No, I didn't get permission yet, but don't worry, it's no sweat. Mike: Benny, excuse me! Women's underwear! Ben: What's that for? I'm not gonna be wearing...
Ben: Oh no, mount, Vesuvius is erupting! Honey you grab the kids, I'll start the chariot and... Glug, glug, glug, this is great, I gotta get an A. Carol: No you won't. Ben: Are you kidding? I got this baby rigged to blow at the push of a button. I m...
Radio: It's two twenty five am and this is for all you lovers who still believe she's stuck in traffic. Mike: Yeah, that's probably it, Kate's probably just stuck in traffic, I mean, the theatre is all the way across campus. OK, I'll give her five m...
Kate: So, you're saying I'm wrong. Mike: No, no, I'm not saying you're wrong, I'm just saying that you know absolutely nothing about women. Kate: Mike, there's not a woman in the world who's gonna let you kiss her after you got her name wrong. Mike:...
Ben: Tell me that's not Gorbachev. OK, it's resources. Iron; I can get one of those. Pottash. Mom, where do we keep the Pottash? Carol: She's in the bathroom. What is all this? Ben: You can't tell! Carol: A map of Russia, drawn by keeping a pen betw...
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Maggie's mom = Kate (Grandma) Maggie's dad = Ed (Grandpa) e Top of the morning to you. j Hi Ed, Kate. Ed!! Ed, what are you doing here? e Got your key out from under the mat; first place a burglar would look, by the way. k I tried to use the micro w...
