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39.

I got my wings. Pa, as Army Air Corps¹ Colonel-in-Chief, pinned them to my chest.

May 2010.

Happy day. Pa, wearing his blue beret, officially presented me with mine. I put it on and wesaluted each other. It felt almost more intimate than a hug.

Camilla was on hand. And Mummy’s sisters. And Chels. We were back together.

Then broke up soon after.

We had no choice—yet again. We had all the same old problems, nothing had been solved.

Also, Chels wanted to travel, have fun, be young, but I was once again on a path to war. I’d soonbe shipping² off. If we stayed together, we’d be lucky to see each other a handful of times over thenext two years, and that was no kind of relationship. Neither of us was surprised when we foundourselves in the same old emotional cul-de-sac.

Goodbye, Chels.

Goodbye, Hazza.

The day I got my wings, I figured she got hers.

We went to Botswana one last time. One last trip upriver, we said. One last visit to Teej andMike.

We had great fun, and naturally wavered about our decision. I tried now and then, and talkednow and then, of different ways this might still work. Chels played along. We were being soobviously, willfully delusional³, that Teej felt the need to step in.

It’s over, kids. You’re postponing⁴ the inevitable⁵. And making yourselves crazy in the process.

We were staying in a tent in her garden. She sat with us in the tent, delivering these difficulttruths while holding hands with each of us. Looking us in the eyes, she urged us to let this breakupbe final.

Don’t waste the most precious thing there is. Time.

She was right, I knew. As Sergeant⁶ Major Booley said: It’s time.

So I forced myself to put the relationship out of my mind—in fact, all relationships. Stay busy,I told myself as I flew away from Botswana. In the short while left before you ship to Afghanistan,just stay busy.

To that end, I went to Lesotho with Willy. We visited several schools built by Sentebale.

Prince Seeiso was with us; he’d co-founded the charity with me back in 2006, shortly after losinghis own mother. (His mother had also been a fighter in the war against HIV.) He took us to meetscores of children, each with a wrenching⁷ story. The average life expectancy⁸ in Lesotho at thattime was forty-something, while in Britain it was seventy-nine for men, eighty-two for women.

Being a child in Lesotho was like being middle-aged⁹ in Manchester, and while there were variouscomplicated reasons for this, the main one was HIV.

A quarter of all Lesotho adults were HIV-positive.

After two or three days we set off with Prince Seeiso towards more remote schools, off thegrid. Way off. As a gift Prince Seeiso gave us wild ponies¹⁰, to ride part of the way, and tribalblankets for the cold. We wore them as capes¹¹.

Our first stop was a frozen village in the clouds: Semonkong. Some seven thousand feet abovesea level, it lay between snow-tipped mountains. Plumes¹² of warm air spurted¹³ from the horses’

noses as we pushed them up, up, but when the climb got too steep, we switched to trucks.

Upon arriving we went straight into the school. Shepherd boys would come here twice a week,have a hot meal, go to a class. We sat in semi-darkness, beside a paraffin lamp, watching a lesson,and then we sat on the ground with a dozen boys, some as young as eight. We listened to themdescribe their daily trek¹⁴ to our school. It defied belief: after twelve hours of tending their cattle andsheep, they’d walk for two hours through mountain passes just to learn maths, reading, writing.

Such was their hunger to learn. They braved sore feet, bitter cold—and far worse. They were sovulnerable on the road, so exposed to the elements, several had died from lightning strikes. Manyhad been attacked by stray dogs. They dropped their voices and told us that many had also beensexually abused by wanderers, rustlers, nomads¹⁵, and other boys.

I felt ashamed to think of all my bitching about school. About anything.

Despite what they’d suffered, the boys were still boys. Their joy was irrepressible. Theythrilled at the gifts we’d brought—warm coats, wool beanies. They put on the clothes, danced,sang. We joined them.

One boy kept to the side. His face was round, open, transparent¹⁶. There was obviously a terribleburden on his heart. I felt it would be prying¹⁷ to ask. But I had one more gift in my bag, a torch,and I gave it to him.

I said I hoped it would light his way each day to school.

He smiled.

I wanted to tell him that his smile would light mine. I tried.

Alas¹⁸, my Sesotho wasn’t very good.

 

1 corps   

n.(通信等兵种的)部队；(同类作的)一组

参考例句：

• The medical corps were cited for bravery in combat.医疗队由于在战场上的英勇表现而受嘉奖。
• When the war broke out,he volunteered for the Marine Corps.战争爆发时，他自愿参加了海军陆战队。

2 shipping   

n.船运（发货，运输，乘船）

参考例句：

• We struck a bargain with an American shipping firm.我们和一家美国船运公司谈成了一笔生意。
• There's a shipping charge of ￡5 added to the price.价格之外另加五英镑运输费。

3 delusional   

妄想的

参考例句：

• You became delusional and attacked several people trying to escape. 你产生了错觉并攻击了许多人还试图逃走。 来自电影对白
• He is incoherent, delusional, suffering auditory hallucinations. 他出现无逻辑的，妄想的，幻听的症状。 来自电影对白

4 postponing   

v.延期，推迟( postpone的现在分词 )

参考例句：

• He tried to gain time by postponing his decision. 他想以迟迟不作决定的手段来争取时间。 来自辞典例句
• I don't hold with the idea of postponing further discussion of the matter. 我不赞成推迟进一步讨论这件事的想法。 来自辞典例句

5 inevitable   

adj.不可避免的，必然发生的

参考例句：

• Mary was wearing her inevitable large hat.玛丽戴着她总是戴的那顶大帽子。
• The defeat had inevitable consequences for British policy.战败对英国政策不可避免地产生了影响。

6 sergeant   

n.警官，中士

参考例句：

• His elder brother is a sergeant.他哥哥是个警官。
• How many stripes are there on the sleeve of a sergeant?陆军中士的袖子上有多少条纹？

7 wrenching   

n.修截苗根，苗木铲根（铲根时苗木不起土或部分起土）v.（猛力地）扭( wrench的现在分词 )；扭伤；使感到痛苦；使悲痛

参考例句：

• China has been through a wrenching series of changes and experiments. 中国经历了一系列艰苦的变革和试验。 来自辞典例句
• A cold gust swept across her exposed breast, wrenching her back to reality. 一股寒气打击她的敞开的胸膛，把她从梦幻的境地中带了回来。 来自汉英文学 - 家（1-26） - 家（1-26）

8 expectancy   

n.期望，预期，（根据概率统计求得）预期数额

参考例句：

• Japanese people have a very high life expectancy.日本人的平均寿命非常长。
• The atomosphere of tense expectancy sobered everyone.这种期望的紧张气氛使每个人变得严肃起来。

9 middle-aged   

adj.中年的

参考例句：

• I noticed two middle-aged passengers.我注意到两个中年乘客。
• The new skin balm was welcome by middle-aged women.这种新护肤香膏受到了中年妇女的欢迎。

10 ponies   

矮种马，小型马( pony的名词复数 )； ￡25 25 英镑

参考例句：

• They drove the ponies into a corral. 他们把矮种马赶进了畜栏。
• She has a mania for ponies. 她特别喜欢小马。

11 capes   

碎谷； 斗篷( cape的名词复数 )； 披肩； 海角； 岬

参考例句：

• It was cool and they were putting on their capes. 夜里阴冷，他们都穿上了披风。
• The pastor smiled to give son's two Capes five cents money. 牧师微笑着给了儿子二角五分钱。

12 plumes   

羽毛( plume的名词复数 )； 羽毛饰； 羽毛状物； 升上空中的羽状物

参考例句：

• The dancer wore a headdress of pink ostrich plumes. 那位舞蹈演员戴着粉色鸵鸟毛制作的头饰。
• The plumes on her bonnet barely moved as she nodded. 她点点头，那帽子的羽毛在一个劲儿颤动。

13 spurted   

（液体，火焰等）喷出，（使）涌出( spurt的过去式和过去分词 )； （短暂地）加速前进，冲刺

参考例句：

• Water spurted out of the hole. 水从小孔中喷出来。
• Their guns spurted fire. 他们的枪喷射出火焰。

14 trek   

vi.作长途艰辛的旅行；n.长途艰苦的旅行

参考例句：

• We often go pony-trek in the summer.夏季我们经常骑马旅行。
• It took us the whole day to trek across the rocky terrain.我们花了一整天的时间艰难地穿过那片遍布岩石的地带。

15 nomads   

n.游牧部落的一员( nomad的名词复数 )；流浪者；游牧生活；流浪生活

参考例句：

• For ten years she dwelled among the nomads of North America. 她在北美游牧民中生活了十年。
• Nomads have inhabited this region for thousands of years. 游牧民族在这地区居住已有数千年了。 来自《简明英汉词典》

16 transparent   

adj.明显的，无疑的；透明的

参考例句：

• The water is so transparent that we can see the fishes swimming.水清澈透明，可以看到鱼儿游来游去。
• The window glass is transparent.窗玻璃是透明的。

17 prying   

adj.爱打听的v.打听，刺探（他人的私事）( pry的现在分词 )；撬开

参考例句：

• I'm sick of you prying into my personal life! 我讨厌你刺探我的私生活！
• She is always prying into other people's affairs. 她总是打听别人的私事。 来自《简明英汉词典》

18 alas   

int.唉(表示悲伤、忧愁、恐惧等)

参考例句：

• Alas!The window is broken!哎呀！窗子破了！
• Alas,the truth is less romantic.然而，真理很少带有浪漫色彩。