英语PK台 第364期:恋爱要配对,相处要慢爱,成家要有爱

 　　1. I study the biology of personality, and I've come to believe that we've evolved four very broad styles of thinking and behaving, linked with the dopamine, serotonin, testosterone and estrogen systems. So I created a questionnaire directly from brain science to measure the degree to which you express the traits—the constellation¹ of traits—linked with each of these four brain systems. Fourteen million or more people have now taken the questionnaire.

　　我研究人格生物学，在研究过程中我慢慢相信人类进化了四种非常广泛的思考和行为方式，它们与多巴胺、血清素、雄激素和雌激素系统息息相关。因此我直接从大脑科学的角度创建了一项调查问卷，衡量人们表达性格特征（分别与这四个大脑系统相关联的一系列性格特征）的程度。一千四百万甚至更多的人已经完成了这项调查问卷。

　　And as it turns out, those who were very expressive² of the dopamine system tend to be curious, creative, spontaneous, energetic. They’re drawn³ to people like themselves. People who are very expressive of the serotonin system tend to be traditional, conventional, they follow the rules, they respect authority, they tend to be religious—religiosity is in the serotonin system—and traditional people go for traditional people. In that way, similarity attracts.

　　事实证明，那些富有多巴胺系统表现力的人往往是好奇的、有创造性的、随性的和精力充沛的。他们同时也被和自己相似的人所吸引。而血清素系统的表达者往往是传统的，他们遵守规则、尊重权威并且通常是宗教信仰者——虔诚的宗教信仰蕴含在血清素系统中——且传统的人趋向追寻他们的同类。在这两种情况下，都是因为相似所以吸引。

　　In the other two cases, opposites attract. People very expressive of the testosterone system tend to be analytical⁴, logical, direct, decisive, and they go for their opposite: they go for somebody who's high estrogen, somebody who's got very good verbal skills and people skills, who's very intuitive and who's very nurturing⁵ and emotionally expressive. We have natural patterns of mate choice. Modern technology is not going to change who we choose to love.

　　而在另外两种情况下正好相反，都是因为不同所以吸引。雄激素系统的表达者的分析与逻辑性强、直接、果断，他们追求与他们不同的人：他们追求高雌激素的人，这些人具有很好的语言表达能力和人际交往能力，善于使用直觉、抚育和表达情感。可见我们的择偶模式是天然决定的。现代科技无法改变我们选择爱谁。

　　2. But technology is producing one modern trend that I find particularly important. It's associated with the concept of paradox⁶ of choice. For millions of years, we lived in little hunting and gathering⁷ groups. You didn't have the opportunity to choose between 1,000 people on a dating site. We can embrace about five to nine alternatives, and after that, you get into what academics call "cognitive⁸ overload⁹," and you don't choose any.

　　但是科技促生出了一个我认为不可小觑的现代趋势。这与“选择的悖论”这一概密切相关。曾在数百万年的时间里,人类都生活在小型的狩猎和采集族群里。那时候可没有机会在一个约会网站上从1000人之中做出选择。我们只能接受5到9个选择，在那以后，我们会进入到一种学者称之为“认知超载”的状态，而做不出任何选择。

　　So I've come to think that due to this cognitive overload, we're ushering¹⁰ in a new form of courtship that I call "slow love." 67 percent of singles in America today who are living long-term with somebody, have not yet married because they are terrified of divorce. They're terrified of the social, legal, emotional, economic consequences of divorce. Today's singles want to know every single thing about a partner before they wed¹¹.

　　因此我认为，由于这种认知超载，我们进入了一个新的求爱形式，我称之为“慢爱”。今天在美国67%的单身人士是和伴侣长期同居但还没有结婚的，因为他们害怕离婚。他们害怕离婚所造成的社会、法律、情感和经济后果。今天的单身人士想在结婚之前了解有关他们另一半的一切事情。

　　But the human brain always triumphs, and indeed, in the United States today, 86 percent of Americans will marry by age 49. I did a study of 1,100 married people and I asked them a lot of questions. But one of the questions was, "Would you re-marry the person you're currently married to?" And 81 percent said, "Yes."

　　尽管如此，人类的大脑总还是会获得最终的胜利——事实表明，在如今的美国，86%的人都会在49岁之前结婚。我曾对1100位已婚人士做过一项研究，问了他们很多问题。其中一个问题是，“你会再和你现在的伴侣结婚吗？”，81%的回答是肯定的。

　　3. I'm not a Pollyanna; there's a great deal to cry about. As William Butler Yeats, the poet, once said, "Love is the crooked¹² thing." I would add, "Nobody gets out alive." We all have problems. But in fact,I think the poet Randall Jarrell really sums it up best. He said, "The dark, uneasy world of family life—where the greatest can fail, and the humblest succeed."

　　我不是一个盲目乐观的人，有很多事情让我悲伤。就像诗人威廉·巴特勒·叶芝说的，“爱情是一条扭曲的路”。“我还要补充一句：“没有人能活着出来。“我们每个人都有情感问题。但事实上，我认为诗人兰德尔·贾雷尔对此做出了最好的总结。他说，“在家庭生活黑暗、不安的世界里，最伟大的也可能失败，最卑微的也可能成功。”

　　But I will leave you with this: love and attachment¹³ will prevail,technology cannot change it. And I will conclude by saying any understanding of human relationships must take into account one of the most powerful determinants of human behavior: the unquenchable,adaptable and primordial¹⁴ human drive to love.

　　无论如何我可以告诉你的是：爱和依恋的联结永远会占上风，技术无法改变它。作为总结我想说，对任何人际关系的理解都必须将一个最强大的人类行为的决定因素纳入考虑，那就是人类不可抗拒、极具适应性且原始的内驱力——去爱。

1 constellation   

n.星座n.灿烂的一群

参考例句：

• A constellation is a pattern of stars as seen from the earth. 一个星座只是从地球上看到的某些恒星的一种样子。
• The Big Dipper is not by itself a constellation. 北斗七星本身不是一个星座。

2 expressive   

adj.表现的，表达…的，富于表情的

参考例句：

• Black English can be more expressive than standard English.黑人所使用的英语可能比正式英语更有表现力。
• He had a mobile,expressive,animated face.他有一张多变的，富于表情的，生动活泼的脸。

3 drawn   

v.拖，拉，拔出；adj.憔悴的，紧张的

参考例句：

• All the characters in the story are drawn from life.故事中的所有人物都取材于生活。
• Her gaze was drawn irresistibly to the scene outside.她的目光禁不住被外面的风景所吸引。

4 analytical   

adj.分析的；用分析法的

参考例句：

• I have an analytical approach to every survey.对每项调查我都采用分析方法。
• As a result,analytical data obtained by analysts were often in disagreement.结果各个分析家所得的分析数据常常不一致。

5 nurturing   

养育( nurture的现在分词 )； 培育； 滋长； 助长

参考例句：

• These delicate plants need careful nurturing. 这些幼嫩的植物需要精心培育。
• The modern conservatory is not an environment for nurturing plants. 这个现代化温室的环境不适合培育植物。

6 paradox   

n.似乎矛盾却正确的说法；自相矛盾的人(物)

参考例句：

• The story contains many levels of paradox.这个故事存在多重悖论。
• The paradox is that Japan does need serious education reform.矛盾的地方是日本确实需要教育改革。

7 gathering   

n.集会，聚会，聚集

参考例句：

• He called on Mr. White to speak at the gathering.他请怀特先生在集会上讲话。
• He is on the wing gathering material for his novels.他正忙于为他的小说收集资料。

8 cognitive   

adj.认知的，认识的，有感知的

参考例句：

• As children grow older,their cognitive processes become sharper.孩子们越长越大，他们的认知过程变得更为敏锐。
• The cognitive psychologist is like the tinker who wants to know how a clock works.认知心理学者倒很像一个需要通晓钟表如何运转的钟表修理匠。

9 overload   

vt.使超载；n.超载

参考例句：

• Don't overload the boat or it will sink.别超载，否则船会沉。
• Large meals overload the digestive system.吃得太饱会加重消化系统的负担。

10 ushering   

v.引，领，陪同( usher的现在分词 )

参考例句：

• They were right where the coach-caller was swinging open a coach-door and ushering in two ladies. "他们走到外面时，叫马车的服务员正打开车门，请两位小姐上车。 来自英汉文学 - 嘉莉妹妹
• Immediately the two of them approached others, thanking them, ushering them out one by one. 他们俩马上走到其他人面前，向他们道谢，一个个送走了他们。 来自辞典例句

11 wed   

v.娶，嫁，与…结婚

参考例句：

• The couple eventually wed after three year engagement.这对夫妇在订婚三年后终于结婚了。
• The prince was very determined to wed one of the king's daughters.王子下定决心要娶国王的其中一位女儿。

12 crooked   

adj.弯曲的；不诚实的，狡猾的，不正当的

参考例句：

• He crooked a finger to tell us to go over to him.他弯了弯手指，示意我们到他那儿去。
• You have to drive slowly on these crooked country roads.在这些弯弯曲曲的乡间小路上你得慢慢开车。

13 attachment   

n.附属物，附件；依恋；依附

参考例句：

• She has a great attachment to her sister.她十分依恋她的姐姐。
• She's on attachment to the Ministry of Defense.她现在隶属于国防部。

14 primordial   

adj.原始的；最初的

参考例句：

• It is the primordial force that propels us forward.它是推动我们前进的原始动力。
• The Neanderthal Man is one of our primordial ancestors.的尼安德特人是我们的原始祖先之一.