The New Baby Mr．and Mrs．Taylor had a seven year old boy named Pat．Now Mrs．Taylor was expecting another child． Pat had seen babies in other people's houses and had not liked them very much，so he was not delighted about the news that there...
As a new father, I quickly learned the true meaning of maternal instinct. Late one night, I was summoned to the hospital to attend to one of my patients. I quietly got up in the dark but tripped over a toy and crashed to the floor. As I lay there rub...
Not Knowing Her Well Wife: Bill, the man in that house opposite always kisses his wife when he leaves in the morning and he kisses her again when he comes back in the evening. Why don't you do that too? Husband: Well, I don't know her very well yet. 我...
Two Pieces of Cake Tom: Mom, can I have two pieces of cake, please? Mom: Certainly----take this piece and cut it two! 两块蛋糕 汤姆：妈妈，我可以吃两块蛋糕吗？ 妈妈：当然可以----拿这块蛋糕把它切成两块吧！...
A New Employee Several weeks after a young man had been hired, he was called into the personnel director's office. What is the meaning of this? the director asked. When you applied for the job, you told us you had five years' experience. Now we disco...
The ruler of an ancient kingdom wanted to disprove the statement that the men of his domain were ruled by their wives．He had all the males in his kingdom brought before him and warned that any man who did not tell the truth would be punished severe...
Excuse for Speeding Harry and Lloyd were speeding down the road. A police car pulled them over. Why on earth were you driving so fast? the policeman yelled. Our brakes are no good-so we wanted to get there before we had an accident! 超速的理由 哈...
When our daughter was born, we named her Myles, after my beloved late father, despite family warning that the name was too masculine. Years later, when i felt she was old enough to understand, I explained to Myles, Your name is very special. I named...
George Ⅲ asked the once wellknown wit， Horne Tooke，whether he could play cards． Your Majesty， replied Tooke， I am a mere childwhere cards are concerned． I cannot even tell a King from aKnave. 乔治三世问一度大名鼎鼎的才子霍恩...
A wealthy old lady who lived near Dr．Swift used to send him presents occasionally by her servant．Dr．Swift took her presents but never gave the boy anything for his trouble．One day as Swift was busy with his writing， the boy rushed into his...
Clean Glass Joe and Fred were helping to build a house in a village. The weather was very warm, there was a lot of dust everywhere, and by half past twelve, they were very thirsty, so they stopped work to have their lunch. They found the nearest smal...
Tolerance Goethe was once strolling on a narrow path in a park in Weimar. As luck would have it, he met with a critic who was hostile to him. Both of them stopped, staring at each other. Then the critic said, I'll never make way for a fool. But I wil...
A teacher was always so involved in the text being studied that he never looked up. He would call on a student for translation and explanation, and-without realizing it-he often chose the same student day after day. Out of respect, the student wouldn...
After his beloved horse died, a man wanted to place an ad in the newspaper like this: Horse saddle and bridle for $50. 一个人衷爱的马死了，他打算在报上登则广告如下：50元卖马鞍和马缰绳。 Inadvertently the paper added a...
At the mall, my wife and I picked up some hardware items, including a handsaw. We were heading back to the car when we passed a steakhouse. Let's try it. my wife suggested. Although I felt a little foolish carrying the saw, I followed her inside. Sca...
