A man sits down on a Boeing 747 next to a mother holding her new baby. Proudly showing off her baby, she turned and angled him to her companion who'd just sat down next to her. Excuse me ma'am, said the man, I don't mean to offend you, but that is th...
A man was crawling across the Desert dying of thirst, when a camel raced up and stopped. An Arab jumped down, opened a suitcase and said, Would you like to buy a tie?No,said the man, 'I need water, do you have water?' 'No,' said the Arab,' but I do h...
Darryl and Harold were in a mental institution. The place had an unusual annual contest, picking two of the bestpatients and giving them two questions. If they got them correct, they were deemed cured and free to go. Darryl was called into the doctor...
What are men really like? Men are like.....Bank Accounts. Without a lot of money they don't generate much interest. Men are like.....Bike helmets. Handy in an emergency but otherwise they just LOOK SILLY. Men are like.....Computers. Hard to figure ou...
Three guys are in a bar discussing how much their wives bitch at them. Theydecide that when they get home, they'll do everything that the women ask. The next weekend, they are in the same bar. The first guy says Man, I don't think that our idea was s...
A person with six children or A person with $6 million? The person with six children of course. Why? Because the one with $6 million wants more....
A one-dollar bill met a twenty-dollar bill and said, Hey, where have you been? I haven't seen you around here much.The twenty answered, I've been hanging out at the casinos(娱乐场）, went on a cruise and did the rounds of the ship, back to the Un...
Two guys are talking about their boss's upcoming wedding. One says, It's ridiculous, he's rich, but he's 93 years old, and she's just 26! What kind of a wedding is that? The other says,Well, we have a name for it in my family. What do you call it? We...
It was at the end of the school year, and a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts from her pupils. The florist's son handed her a gift. She shook it, held it overhead, and said, I bet I know what it is. Some flowers. That's right the boy said, but...
A football coach walked into the locker room (衣帽间)before a game, looked over to his star player and said, I'm not supposed to let you play since you failed math, but we need you in there. So, what I have to do is ask you a math question, and if...
A man was sued by a woman for defamation of character. She charged that he had called her a pig. The man was found guilty and fined. After the trial he asked the judge, Does this meanthat I cannot call Mrs. Johnson a pig?The judge said that was true....
A man was sued by a woman for defamation of character. She charged that he had called her a pig. The man was found guilty and fined. After the trial he asked the judge, Does this meanthat I cannot call Mrs. Johnson a pig?The judge said that was true....
Three engineers and three accountants are traveling by train to a conference. At the station, the three accountants each buy tickets and watch as the threeengineers buy only a single ticket. How are three people going to travel on only one ticket? as...
It was the first day of school. As the principal made his rounds, he heard a terriblecommotion coming from one of the classrooms. He rushed in and spotted one boy, taller than the others, who seemed to be making the most noise. He seized the lad, dra...
Sam Becky are celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary and Sam says to Becky, So, Becky, I waswondering... Have you ever cheated on me?Becky replies, Oh Sam, why would you ask such aquestion now? You don't want to ask that question...Yes, Becky, I...
